One of my mentors just sent me an article that really got me thinking about the way our generation is and how lazy a lot of us are compared with previous generations… in fact I can hear my dad reminding me how he used to walk 5 miles up hill both ways to school when he was younger.
**side note: my dad’s school was right on the same street he lived on, about a 3 minute walk…on a flat road Love you Dad**
If you want to know what got me fired up to write this, you can check out the article at 22 Stats That Prove That There Is Something Seriously Wrong With Young Men In America.
The Peter Pan Generation
Image source: Peter Pan
Alright, so I’ve gotta admit something right off the bat. Peter Pan was one of my favorite movies when I was younger and the concept of “never growing up” has been one that has stuck with me to this day.
Now you might think its sad of me to believe that I never have to grow up, or that I’m not taking full responsibility for my life by choosing the route of Peter Pan.
I’m here to tell you WHY I choose to still believe that growing up in the traditional sense of the word is quite silly and why I agree on certain points this article made, and disagree with others.
I’m just going to get this out of the way as well:
I firmly believe that it is a man’s responsibility to take care of himself, make sure he has a place to live(that’s not his parents), have food to eat and be financially independent. My personal opinion is that we need to do all of these things to truly live a fulfilled life and to be able to add value to the world.
Now i’m going to address a couple of the points made in the post I read…
“Last week, I read that there is even a name for people such as me. We are the ‘Peter Pan generation’; a sizeable group of 25 to 40-year-olds who exist in a state of extended adolescence, avoiding the trappings of responsibility — marriage, mortgage, children — for as long as possible.”
Some are living with their parents even until their 30’s, saying that because there are no jobs available they cannot live on their own because they can’t afford it.
I personally believe that there are jobs available all over the US, it’s just that many people live in a city or town where there aren’t many jobs available.
If that’s you, check out the article >> 10 US cities with the most unfilled job openings <<
Let’s just face the facts here, it’s uncomfortable for a lot of people to move to a new city to pursue a job, which prevents a lot of people from ever doing it.
It’s scary to move to a new city, not knowing anyone, and try to make it. I’ve done it and it scared the crap out of me. I have many friends who have done the same thing and are now enjoying their life more than ever because they stepped out of their comfort zones.
To those of you reading this who live with your parents and are working to save money to get your own place or to be in a better financial position to move out and have a cushion for your finances, I respect that. This is not directed at you. Keep hustlin!
If you believe that the world owes you a job because of who your parents are or for some other reason, you need to wake the f*#$ up.
The world owes us nothing.
We are granted the opportunity to live. We are giving the chance to create the life we want. It’s not going to be easy in the least bit, but it will be worth it.
The truth is that it is our responsibility to become a linchpin for anything that we work on.
What is a linchpin? According to Seth Godin:
“There used to be two teams in every workplace: management and labor. Now there’s a third team, the linchpins. These people figure out what to do when there’s no rule book. They delight and challenge their customers and peers. They love their work, pour their best selves into it, and turn each day into a kind of art.
Linchpins are the essential building blocks of great organizations. They may not be famous but they’re indispensable. And in today’s world, they get the best jobs and the most freedom.”
-Seth Godin in the book Linchpin
It is our responsibility to get off our lazy asses, learn a new skill and work our asses off to become an asset to a company. Quit spending 5 or 6 hours a day playing Farmville and start doing something productive with our lives.
We need to take responsibility to improve our lives and it starts right now.
Okay, so I agree with him that many people in our generation are extremely lazy..
What about getting married?
In this article, it stated “#20 Today, an all-time low 44.2% of Americans between the ages of 25 and 34 are married.”
I spend a lot of time learning about relationships, love, sex and how its an important part of our life. I’ve dated quite a few girls, been in long term relationships and at my current age (25) I feel like I am in no position to be married.
The other day I spent about an hour talking with a couple who will have been married for 60 years on January 3rd. They started dating when he was 17 and she was 15, married at 19 and 17 and have been together ever since.
While I think that is 100% awesome, it is not something that I would be comfortable doing. Over the past few years I have met some of the most interesting and some of the craziest girls out there and I’ve learned something from every single one of them.
Many of them helped encourage me to become better and without them I would not be where I’m at today.
Some of the girls even encouraged me when they looked on my bookshelf and saw that I was reading books like The Way of The Superior Man, The Female Brain, Why Men Love Bitches and King, Warrior, Magician, Lover:Rediscovering the Archetypes of the Mature Masculine.
**all of those link to the respected book on Amazon via an affiliate link, I get a small commission if you choose to buy through that link**
Those books are all about becoming a better man.
Well, except the Why Men Love Bitches book, that’s a book written for females to learn about why men are attracted to a strong woman who stands up for herself. I read that so I could better understand the process a woman needs to go through to live her optimal life so I can help my girlfriends on their personal path.
The reason I feel that I am not in a position to be married right now is because I like different things about different girls I date. Some of them encourage me to be more adventurous, while others encourage me with business and others encourage me with other aspects of my life.
I’m sure that at some point I will find someone who is exactly what I would want in a wife, but until then I’m going to continue to learn from everyone I meet. In fact, the other day in Costa Rica I met a girl who was a few years older than me and had been to about 15 of the places I plan on visiting.
We got along great and will definitely be staying in touch throughout the years, probably meeting up in different places and having a great time. Am I going to marry her just because of that? Nope.
I’m going to stay single and continue to learn more about what qualities I truly love about a girl and what qualities I do not like. This way I’ll stay happy and when I get married, it’ll be for life.
You’re supposed to have a mortgage at 25!
This was the case for the baby boomer generation and generations before that and for good reasons.
They didn’t have all the technology we have available to be able to live longer, work all around the world and do many of the things we currently take for granted. Travel was a lot more difficult and it was impossible to make money from a normal job when you weren’t in the office. Lucky for us, we can make internet monies.
At this point in my life, I have visited quite a few different places on this planet and still don’t know where I want to live for the rest of my life. For example, right now I’m living in Boquete, Panama.
I love the ability to spend a few months in one spot and then move a few months later to explore other spots. I guess that explains why I switched colleges 3 different times…it opens my mind to how other people live and allows me to be grateful for what I have, as well as teach me about what I ultimately want.
If I was to have a mortgage, I would be stuck in one spot living there and maintaining my house. This would really limit the people who I get to meet and my general happiness level.
If I had a normal job that didn’t allow me to work wherever my laptop was, I would probably have a mortgage.
At this point in my life, I am doing what makes me happy and will continue to do the things that make me happy. I’m sure that as I get older some of the things I enjoy will change and I am 100% okay with that.
However at this point, I’m glad that I don’t have a mortgage, marriage or children.